Ongoing October
on letting go, friendship, music, apples, and remembering what matters
Dear friends,
October invites us to practice the art of letting go.
The trees do it without guilt or resistance. They don’t cling to what once served them. Their surrender is an act of trust.
I’m learning from them.
This month I’ve been thinking about how release often feels like loss, when really it’s space-making. Sometimes what’s falling away isn’t failure—it’s a quiet reordering of our priorities.
In How to Die Well, I write about how facing endings—of relationships, seasons, or even life itself—can make us more alive to what matters most. Talking about death doesn’t make it happen faster; it makes life richer.
Practice: Breathe with the Trees
Find a tree that’s changing color.
Stand or sit nearby.
Inhale as you notice its grounded strength.
Exhale as you imagine releasing one small thing that no longer serves you.
Pause. Notice what remains.
Falling in Love Again
At the last minute, dear friends who had attended Jon Batiste’s concert in another city urged us to go—and, in an act of great generosity, even helped make it possible by contributing toward our tickets. I’m so glad we said yes. The evening was refreshing, captivating, and utterly contagious. It felt like an invitation to fall in love with life again—to remember that joy and grief can dance on the same stage.
As writer Shan Overton described in her Substack, The Sparrow Chronicles, the concert was “part circus, part tent revival, part tour through American musical invention.” That’s exactly how it felt: a communal exhale, a reminder that art and spirit are intertwined, and that sometimes the holiest thing we can do is sing, sway, and let our hearts be lifted by sound.
The generosity of those friends—their willingness to share joy and extend grace—became its own kind of music. It reminded me that love often shows up through invitation, through shared experience, and through remembering that beauty, like grace, is meant to be passed along.
From the Writing Desk
Lately, I’ve been filming short reflections for TikTok and Instagram about death positivity and living funerals—rituals that remind us to speak our love while we’re still here.
You can watch this week’s trio:
Myth-Bust: Talking about death doesn’t make it happen faster—it makes life richer.
Story: You don’t have to wait to die to hear the nice things people would say at your funeral.
Reflection: Funerals tell the truth about us—sometimes more than we’d like.
You can follow my short reflections on TikTok at @howtodie.well.
Behind the Scenes: Learning TikTok (Again)
Despite having made short videos on TikTok before, it recently took me nearly five hours to produce a 40-second clip. Somewhere between trimming, captioning, and uploading, I realized this ratio of effort to output was… not ideal. Sigh.
Once I got over the learning curve, things began moving faster. These days I batch-record three short videos at a time and post them on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. I’ve also accepted that right now, I’m aiming for consistency over perfection.
As a writer and content creator, this isn’t exactly the fun part of my work—but it is a meaningful way to share ideas that matter. For now, I’m doing my best to embrace the process of creating these little windows into How to Die Well.
I’m also cross-posting them on Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn. If you’re on any of those platforms, it truly helps when you take a few seconds to like, subscribe, or comment on the questions I pose. Your engagement helps others discover this work.
Find & Follow
If you’d like to stay connected beyond Be Well, you can find me here:
🎥 TikTok: @howtodie.well — short reflections on grief, joy, and living well.
📸 Instagram: @joanne.e.spence — glimpses of daily life, embodied prayer, and behind-the-scenes writing.
📘 Facebook: Joanne Spence, Author & Yoga Therapist — community updates, events, and encouragement.
💼 LinkedIn: Joanne Spence — professional updates, courses, and speaking engagements.
Every “like,” comment, or share helps this work find others who might need a moment of breath, beauty, or grace.
What I’m Reading
Ebenezer Chronicles: The Missing Spiritual Practice by Bonnie Budzowski (2025)
This book takes what feels like a quiet, neglected spiritual habit—the act of remembering God’s grace in Scripture and in our lives—and brings it into the foreground. In her words: “Could a practice of personal remembrance bring fresh power and joy into your spiritual experience?”
Budzowski draws on the biblical example of the “Ebenezer” (a “stone of help” raised in thankfulness) and shows how our memories of grace function in the same way—markers of what God has done, setting our feet on firmer ground.
What I love about this book:
It weaves together her personal stories of struggle, wonder, and healing with rich biblical reflections.
It invites us to pause—really pause—to recall what God has done, rather than constantly striving ahead without noticing.
It frames “remembrance” not as a passive act but as a spiritually formative practice: one that builds resilience, gratitude, and rootedness.
Highly recommended. If you’re hungry to deepen your embodied spiritual life—particularly in the intersections where the body, the nervous system, memory and faith meet—this book will speak to you. It aligns beautifully with the themes I explore here at Be Well (body awareness, remembering our stories, breath-practice, and more).
I’ll be returning to it throughout the season—and I invite you to consider doing the same. Perhaps we’ll revisit a quote or a reflection from the book in a future issue.
A Note About Supporting Authors
You can purchase Ebenezer Chronicles: The Missing Spiritual Practice here and learn more about Bonnie Budzowski and her work here.
As I mention in each Be Well newsletter, one of the best (and easiest) ways to support an author is by writing a brief review—just one to three sentences—on Amazon, Goodreads, or Barnes & Noble. You can simply copy and paste the same review to each site.
If you enjoy Bonnie’s book—and I believe you will—please take five minutes to share a quick review. Don’t overthink it. This small act of appreciation doesn’t just lift an author’s spirits; it also helps the algorithms share meaningful work with more readers who need it.
In our current world of endless noise, thoughtful stories and grounded spiritual practices deserve to be seen. Your few words truly make a difference.
Full disclosure: Bonnie is a good friend. I have included a few pictures from the book launch celebration yesterday. It was so good to get to celebrate a friend and a fellow author!
💬 Community Prompt
What are you releasing this fall?
A pattern, an expectation, a fear, a thing?
Share in the comments—I love reading your reflections.
🍎 Baking Apples
’Tis the season. My husband recently brought home a bushel of apples — that’s a lot of apples. He finds joy in peeling, coring, and cooking down a mix of varieties — mostly McIntosh and Cortland. I admire his patience. I, on the other hand, don’t usually have the time (or the temperament) for such projects.
Which is why I stumbled onto another way of making applesauce. One evening, while roasting butternut squash and broccoli, I noticed a little room left on the sheet pan. I added a cored apple, lightly scored with a knife, thinking it might crisp up. Instead, it collapsed beautifully into a warm, caramelized heap of homemade applesauce.
To make this work, peel and cube the butternut squash into one-inch pieces — the hardest (and most strenuous) part of this meal. Toss everything with olive oil, a pinch of salt, and a grind of pepper. Roast at 400°F for about 20 minutes.
Serve it all together — sweet apple alongside savory squash — and you’ve got a simple, cozy meal for two.
My First Attempt at Venison Jerky
Some of you know that Doug loves to hunt and fish. Lucky for me, I love to cook what he brings home. For years, I’ve been threatening to make venison jerky, collecting recipes that all seemed far too complicated.
In case you don’t know, jerky is a shelf-stable, dehydrated form of meat—great for travel or snacks on the trail. Commercial versions can be pricey and often packed with preservatives.
Then, during one of my late-night recipe-scrolling binges (yes, I do that), I found a simple method that finally got me to try. I started with a pound of raw ground venison, mixed in seasonings, and spread it thinly on a parchment-lined baking sheet. I lightly scored the surface with a knife (to make it easier to break apart later) and baked it in a 175°F oven for about six hours.
The result? Absolutely delicious. Now I’m eager to experiment with different spice blends. The finished jerky stores beautifully in small bags or jars—and has officially become my new favorite hiking snack. For this recipe, I started with a pound of ground vension, 1 teaspoon each of salt, garlic powder, rosemary, and oregano, and 1/2 teaspoon of black pepper, and 1 tablespoon of olive oil. Mix well, then roll out thinly onto a parchment lined sheet pan. Score with a knife. Bake at 175 degrees for 5-6 hours. Let cool then break apart. Store in the fridge.
These seasonings resulted in a fairly mild flavor - and still yummy. I think I will try some teriyaki flavor next time.
🌿 How to Engage with My Work
If something in Be Well speaks to you, there are a few gentle ways to stay connected:
🕯 Subscribe — If you’re reading this because a friend forwarded it, you can subscribe here to receive Be Well directly in your inbox each month.
🎥 Watch — I’m sharing short reflections on TikTok @howtodie.well and on Instagram @joanne.e.spence. These little videos explore embodied spirituality, grief, and living well in light of death.
📖 Read — My forthcoming book, How to Die Well: A Workbook for the Living, invites readers to face mortality as a way to live with more tenderness and awe. Stay tuned for updates on publication and preorders.
🧘♀️ Practice — Join me for courses and retreats that weave Christian contemplative practice, yoga, and nervous system awareness. Offerings include Pray with Your Whole Body.
💌 Connect — I love hearing from readers. You can reply directly to this email or reach out via my website to share a reflection or a question.
However you choose to engage—by reading, watching, breathing, or praying along—you’re part of a growing circle of people learning to be well, body and soul.
🌾 Blessing
May you let go with grace.
May you rest without guilt.
May your body remember that falling can also be a form of flight.
Until next time,
Be well,
Joanne
🧭 Tags / Hashtags (for cross-posting)
#BeWell #HowToDieWell #DeathPositive #LettingGo #EmbodiedFaith #YogaTherapy #MindfulLiving #SpiritualPractice
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Thanks for sharing the gentle message about leaves in the fall and letting go--to make space in our lives. That's helpful for me to hear. Thanks also for sharing the message of my book, Ebenezer Chronicles. As you mentioned, remembering, as a spiritual discipline is active, rather than passive. It is not, however, hard. Remembering God's grace brings joy and resilience to our faith.